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CONTENTS          
0 Home
1 Introduction
2 Sex Please
3 Rome Antics
4 Rome Spell Neat
5 Kin King Klan King
6 Romana Be Public
7 Patrician Attrition
8 Appalling Gaul
9 Roaming Italy
10 Satiric Pyrrhic
11 Rome In Poem
12 Gods Be Lazy
13 Conclusion

 


1 INTRODUCTION


Welcome to the Free Interactive Musical Virtual Bedside Companion to the The Bloody Funny History of Rome  updated every day with new cartoons, jokes and laughs. Click the contents bar on the left for different pages. It's said that the only accurate quotation is a misquotation, the one duty we owe to history is to rewrite it, and the very best humor always offends somebody - so there should be something here for everyone!
 

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Footnote - note foot massage between toes! Chapter 1 of The Bloody Funny History of Rome is a Slave's address which begins "Tell the reader, Salve" since all ancient books were read aloud by Reading Slaves and no self-respecting Roman would ever dream of reading to themself when they had an expensively trained specialist to do it for them - who also served hot honeyed-wine and massaged your feet. So, for an authentic historical experience you should have somebody else read this page aloud to you. If you don't have a slave, I can lend you one of ours (since this is a special occasion) so if you'd like to lie back, relax like a real Roman and LISTEN TO THE READING SLAVE READ THIS PAGE. But please don't over-use the Reading Slave! The Roman philosopher and bookworm Pliny was known to make his Reading Slave recite at such long length that he ended up spitting blood!

TODAY'S NEW CARTOON

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TODAY'S NEW MUSING


While the other chapters all have a commentary on their daily cartoons, this introduction doesn't, since it's just to give you a taste of what you're in for. If you know already what the cartoon is all about - well done!

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